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Howling Good Time

2007-08-14

Howling Good Time
 
I have been having so much fun with my head in the books that my head feels like it's going to explode. Just kidding it's not that hard just a lot of reading 200 to 300 pages a day. I have one test this week and three in two weeks, then who know... I would like to see my wife and kids but she is working and the kids are in school so flying them up here is out of the question.
 
Besides I need to get my sleep, and they would keep me awake and I miss out on enough sleep just reading and doing tests. I find it easy to study when I don't have a bunch of other people around... some people do better in a group, I do better one my own.
 
How do you study? With others or on your own...
 
Well enough of this stuff, I like posting and such... but I have to get back to the books for another hour before I call it quits for the night, I have to get up at 5:30 a.m. and take a shower, eat some captian crunch, watch angel, and get out the door down the stairs and into the van to go to school.
 
Well I'll run out of here dropping a joke along the way...
 
We Really Can't Win!
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.
 
I Want You To Take Off My...
A woman calls her husband into the bedroom. "Now Mike, I want you to take off my blouse!"
"Good.."
"Now I also want you to take off my Bra."
"Good..."
"Now can you take off my panties."
"Very Good! Now, don't let me catch you wearing them again!"
 
According to the dictionary
A Koala bear decides he wants to get laid, so he picks up a hooker. He goes down on her several times and they are really enjoying themselves. After they are finished the koala bear starts getting dressed.
The hooker says, "wheres my money?"
The koala bear shrugs his shoulders. The hooker repeats herself asking for her money. Again he shrugs his shoulders. The hooker grabs a dictionary and looks up the word hooker and shows it to the koala bear.
It says "gets paid for sex."
The koala bear picks up the dictionary and looks up Koala Bear and shows it to the hooker.
It says, "Eats bush and leaves!"
 
A Night At The Farmhouse
The salesman stopped at a farmhouse one evening to ask for room and board for the night. The farmer told him there was no vacant room.
"I could let you sleep with my daughter," the farmer said, "if you promise not to bother her."
The salesman agreed. After a hearty supper, he was led to the room. He undressed in the dark, slipped into bed, and felt the farmer's daughter at his side.
The next morning he asked for his bill.
"It'll be just two dollars, since you had to share the bed," the farmer said.
"Your daughter was very cold," the salesman said.
"Yes, I know," said the farmer. "We're going to bury her today."
 
In The Public Restroom
Bob goes into the public restroom and sees this guy standing next to the urinal. The guy has no arms. As Bob's standing there, taking care of business, he wonders to himself how the poor wretch is going to take a leak.
Bob finishes and starts to leave when the man asks Bob to help him out. Being a kind soul, Bob says, "Ah, OK, sure, I'll help you."
The man asks, "Can you unzip my zipper?"
Bob says, "OK."
Then the man says, "Can you pull it out for me?"
Bob replies, "Uh, yeah, OK."
Bob pulls it out and it has all kinds of mold and red bumps, with hair clumps, rashes, moles, scabs, scars, and reeks something awful. Then the guy asks Bob to point it for him, and Bob points for him. Bob then shakes it, puts it back in and zips it up.
The guy tells Bob, "Thanks, man, I really appreciate it."
Bob says, "No problem, but what the hell's wrong with your penis?"
The guy pulls his arms out of his shirt and says, "I don't know, but I ain't touching it.
 
Source: http://www.aardvarkarchie.com/jokes/index.htm  
 
Alright that's enough sick stuff for now, have a good night... 

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